Meet the Judges!

[Tawa]

I genuinely would like to put on weight, Mark !
I burn calories by simply sitting still.  .......Resting pulse rate is at the high end of 'normal' for an adult.

You and me both. My metabolism is pretty much redlining when I'm sat idle. I've already burned off the calories from tomorrow nights tea whilst typing this..... 

Now that I've 'matured'

Well, we know that's a lie!