Internal phones....

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Always worried me that phrase!

Anyway, our school runs on a series of internal phones 📱
Anyone got any good answering ideas?
Today I've used 'Baton Rouge Morgue' and 'Gamma quadrant', yesterday was 'Ecuadorian Embassy'!

[Ithoriel]

"How did you get this number? Please remain where you are! Special Branch will be with you shortly." .... no? ... yeah, maybe not!

[d_Guy]

I have an infernal phone. It keeps butt dialing people and taking lop-sided pictures of the carpet. Oh! wait! Never mind.

[fsn]

I tend to use the proper "ahoy-hoy!" if I'm in a good mood, and just my surname if I'm not.

That way, people know what they're getting.

[Techno]

"Strategic missile command, please enter coordinates and authorisation code." 

Cheers - Phil.

(Thanks for the prezzie, Nobby.....I'll bung you a proper mail a bit later.)

[Wulf]

Our senior tech used to always answer "This is the war office, who wants a fight?"

[Leon]

"Battersea Dogs Home, woof woof!"

"Charlie's Crematorium, you kill 'em, we grill 'em!"

[Subedai]

'Speak, you phoned me!'

MickS

[Chris Pringle]

"Ah, Sturmbannfuehrer!"

[ronan]

good ones !


I sometimes use : "Vatican Sports Service, Hello ?" ( in french of course, but ... I may try it in english ..)

[Orcs]

"erectile dysfunction clinic"

"Vajazzles are us"

"London Zoo, Geoffrey the  giraffe speaking"

"Broadmoor psychopath ward"

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Since I work in a lower school, with several members of staff who used to work as ZSL Whipsnade, three could be a enormous laugh!

[fsn]

"Nigerian claim line .. please hold ..."

"Hello, I'm glad I got through, I've been holding for ages, could you help me with my computer there a red light that ..."

"Before your call, I deign to hear,
a question you must answer,
upon which tank would you bank,
a Sherman or a Panther?"

[Orcs]

Since I work in a lower school, with several members of staff who used to work as ZSL Whipsnade, three could be a enormous laugh!

Whoops I forgot you were a Schoolteacher - More appropriate ones to follow

"Hello this is Mr C Lion "

"Teaching assistants suicide help line"

"Michael Gove appreciation Society"

"My pencil is sharp and ready for action"

"Help Miss Jones  has me in the stock Cupboard"

[FierceKitty]

My all-time favourite was a very self-possessed little five-year-old: "5344578, I am Chiara Flockermann-Gaylard, who are you?"